Tuesday 3 January 2017

Wilhelm Hasburg



Greetings vaqueros! Today I'm showing you my last finished miniature from last year, a present from a fellow Scale Creep in our WiPster Kris Kringle - Wilhelm Hasburg, warrior priest of Sigmar!

Which WiPster gave me this lovely Wilhelm miniature? Noone knows. but they obviously know me well, I've been wanting this guy since he came out back in the heady days of 5th edition fantasy, where he was one half of the dynamic witch hunting duo available from the Dogs of War army list - the other half being the grim witch hunter Johann van Hal, who will not be appearing in this film due to budgetary constraints.

His life seems a sad tale, but they omitted his penchant for sexy raves and all the coke he did at them.
Wilhelm's signature weapon is an ox-jaw on a stick, which seems dumb and unwieldy, but hey, have YOU ever tried using one? HAVE you? No, I didn't think so. He could be on to something big here. I just hope that one day, humankind doesn't make an ox-jaw on a stick so immense, so powerful, that they destroy themselves with it. That would be a bummer.

"Stand back! He's got an ox-jaw on a stick!"

"I think it's powering up!"

"Mummy!"
The ox-jaw, once wielded by Sigmar himself to destroy an army of skaven, is a reference to a character from everyone's favourite book of blood-and-thunder adventure, violence, sexual politics and mass genocide: The Holy Bible. Samson, the famous strongman who drew his immense power from his luxurious long hair, was said to have killed 1000 Philistines with the jaw of an ass, which is pretty cool I guess, but it is the view of many that the Bible has long suffered from containing a lack of skaven.

"Aaargh this lion is kicking my ass! Why did I choose this morning to trim my pubes?!"
Wilhem clutches to his breast a copy of the Hammer of Witches, a useful tome that explains all the best and most humane ways to get rid of your unfortunate witch infestation, and reads from it litanies and banishments that make him immune to evil magiks approx. 50% of the time.

It also contains a shit hot recipe for cooking ribs.
 I chose to paint the book gold and deep blue, with little specks here and there to give it that celestial look that is all the rage with kids these days. The rest of the scheme follows the general look of Sigmarite priests over the years, which is sort of a cross between a Franciscan Monk and a Jedi. The crosses are more witch hunter symbolism than strictly Sigmarite, which tends to be the twin tailed comet, but witch hunters and warrior priests go arm in arm in several Warhammer settings, and also, crosses are easier to freehand without making them look like a twin-tailed poo dollop.

Speaking of different settings, this model is most likely to see action in a Mordheim witchhunter warband, so I have based him up accordingly, by sculpting the obligatory 'lobsterfish eating rat' - I know, it's basically cliche to do that at this point, what with the plethora of lobsterfish eating rats that bombard us in everyday life in all corners of popular culture, but hey, I never claimed to have much imagination.

"mmmff, mmf, forry, be done in a minute, omff nomff..."
And what's next? Well, every holy man needs a demonic adversary to battle...

"I lost at Scrabble again? Table flipping time raaAAAAGH!"

Adios for now!

16 comments:

  1. Good lolz thee mec and the painting is spectacular, the model coudln't have gone in better ends really. Unless they were Mike McVey's of course, or Darren Latham's, or Jakob Nielsen, he'd do a fine job too, and David Soper, gosh that guy is good... anyway, good thing you got it. Looking for a full band now.

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    1. I have a lot of witch hunters from my original warband that could do with modernising... but since you just compared me to all those legends, i'm getting a monumental case of Mr Floppy Brush so I think i'll just focus on, I don't know, Pogs or something.

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  2. Forget giant samurai daemons, I require more lobster fish please.

    Your witch hunting priest is great too. He's packed with extra details for repeat viewing pleasure :)

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    1. Maybe i'll make a sci-fi lobsterfish to hang out with my pisceans and raging fishmen.

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  3. Nice PJ on that maniac there Captain. Its also nice to see a figure desired for so long finally get painted and ready. A great start to the year.

    Plus blasphemy, hooray!

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    1. Sweet sweet blasphemy. The good lord knows I do love me some of that.

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  4. Love the white robes, you did an excellent job making them look dirty without looking splotchy. The book looks great too!

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    1. I spent a little time trying to get the mud splats to my liking, sort of a mixture of Stirland Mud texture paint, dabs of ordinary brown paint and a little Agrax Earthshade spotting here and there. I didn't want to go crazy with the robe weathering; he is a Sigmarite priest first, murderhobo second...

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  5. Bashing the Bible +1, Ox jawbone love +1, creating a new mutant rat thing +1, funny haha content +1......all adds up to a win :)

    Oh yeah, the minis not bad either :P

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  6. Nice job Cap'n, that's a mighty fine mini. Mighty ox jaw power-up - activate!

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    1. Careful now don't drop it, the planet's crust isn't that thick! D:

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  7. Good work. I have never used the jawbone of an animal to kill a man, but being Catholic I am ok with the concept! Nice painting and the crossed look good to me.

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    1. Whiskey Priest pointed out that the ol' animal jaw was,in many accounts, the very first murder weapon, as Cain supposedly used one to kill Abel. Clearly there is some latent murderpower in those mouldy tooth-racks...

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  8. I hadn't thought of that, but he actually kind of reminds me a little of John Cleese with long hair. That only adds some awesomeness in my mind, but hey, the whole composition is cool! Extra points to the lobsterfish eating rat! Or maybe the rat is eating the lobsterfish from the inside... Hmmm...

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    1. In Mordheim, all things are permitted and anything is possible. Mainly because there is no '1 always fails' rule...

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