Greetings vaqueros! Today I have a very special post for you, as in between bouts of naked HeroQuest and pondering the deeper meanings and consequences of HeroCults, I've been assembling and painting my very first professionally cast and produced model kit, the Boom Wagon, now on sale from Ramshackle Games.
The 'Boom Wagon' is a strange vehicle, almost certainly the offspring of a saucy three-way with a tank destroyer, a dragster and the kind of chopped down hot rod that would make ZZ Top blush into their extravagant beards.
|"Fritz! Iz zere any way we can make zis tank more gun?"|
|"Frank! Is there any way we can make this car more rocket?"|
|"Steve! Is there-"|
"Shhh... this one is perfect."
|Every car has a 'face'. This one is going 'yuuuh?!'|
When I approached Ramshackle Games about mastering this for potential casting, they were more than happy to oblige. Ramshackle offer casting services to amateurs like me who produces a nice model kit or miniature, in exchange for the rights to the master. Instead of monetary payment, you get to have copies of your original... lots of copies!
|Those aren't kill markings, that's just the number of times the barrel has exploded|
The concept of building a vehicle around a giant gun is not a new one, nor is it exclusive to fantasy worlds or the post apocalypse. The afore-mentioned tank hunters, and even military jets like the A-10 Warthog are all designed around the premise of bringing your biggest gun to the gunfight, preferably with something fast and angry wrapped around it spitting out fire and deadly fumes, for added effect.
|"GRAAA ANGER MANAGEMENT IS A BREEZE WHEN YOU HAVE A SEVEN BARREL AVENGER CANNON!"|
Of course, given that we live on the internet, there will always be naysayers who think that it isn't enough to just have a rad car that also happens to be a cannon - they have to try and figure out all the boring minutiae, like 'where do they fit the ammo for that cannon in that tiny cab?'
|Seriously man you're ruining xmas for everyone...|
Well, Question Guy, I've gone to great lengths to provide you with a detailed look at the inside of the Boom Wagon so you can see exactly how it all works:
|Yeah okay I admit it, I'm not sure where they are gonna fit the ammo amongst all that wet mess. Nor do I care. Pass the boiled green leg.|
My choice of paint scheme for this model was easy. Lots of red, lots of checks, lots of weathering and lots of sexy sexness. This car will impress the gender best aligned with your affections. This car will impregnate your cat. This car will blast a hole through a wall then drive through that hole and keep going because it is immensely, immensely phallic and doesn't know the meaning of the word 'lube'.
|All those checks were painted by hand. Yep. No ancient, crumbling, nightmarish decals used here in dozens of carefully arranged rows, no sirree.|
|Hanging out with some old friends...|
So there it is, a big milestone for me and my hobby endeavors. It's been super thrilling watching these nutty looking vehicles begin to appear here and there over the last few weeks. You should all go and treat yourselves to one, go on. It's a nice easy build and super fun to paint too :D
And what's next? Well, badass vehicles are like whole spit-roasted cows, you can never just stop at one...
|"Fritz! Iz zere a way to make zis tank more ork?"|